the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
