He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
