im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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