It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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