Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
