Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
