You're so nebulous sometimes
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I think I died a long time ago.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
