is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
