He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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