Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
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For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
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Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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