I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
