I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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