When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Alive.
So much puke
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
