Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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