but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
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i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
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So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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