her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
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