Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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