Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
