What a fucking waste of an outfit
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
