Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
