Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

why didn't you poke me back

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(972): View more from Texas

they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!

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(631): View more from New York

My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..

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(712): View more from Iowa

He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning

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(651): View more from Minnesota

She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."

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(407): View more from Florida

the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.

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(503): View more from Oregon

He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.

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