So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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