I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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