Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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