best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
