Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
