i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
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mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
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my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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