Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize