I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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