i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize