He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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