would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
