everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just pee around me
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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