I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
how drunk are you?
Several
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
