i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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