She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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