Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
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