paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize