Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Randomize