Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
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how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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