There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
