Nicole vs. Life
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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