The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
