just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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