just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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