I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.