I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
