whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Randomize