WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
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Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
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Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
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