I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Randomize