he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
