Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Two words: blizzard sex
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
