One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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